jkkitty (jkkitty) wrote,

Never Assume

Napoleon's Valentine plans are ruined, almost permanently.  Written and post last year on FF  for Valentine's day.  It occurs after Napoleon and Jo have been seeing one another and although not committed to each other yet, they have come to an agreement.

It was two a.m. when Josephina Kuryakin threw her suitcase on her bed. She was tired, dirty, and in a bad mood. The fact that Waverly had spent the last half-an-hour dressing her down for the way she had handled the assignment that she had just returned from didn't help her disposition.

It had only been successful because of an accident, not her skills, and he had let her know a rookie could've performed better. She had to admit he was correct, and was angry with herself for making a mess of it.

After a fast shower, she grabbed the bottle of champagne that she had brought back from France to share with Napoleon, heading to his apartment a few floors above her. She hoped he was in the frame of mind to make her feel better.

They had been apart for over a month, and she missed him, confident he would feel the same way. Some slow, sensational sex would be the solution to her problems.

Using the key he had given her, she unlocked his door and entered the security codes, turning them off. After resetting them, she placed the bottle of champagne on the coffee table and tiptoed into Napoleon's bedroom.

As she entered the bedroom, she noticed lit candles around the room and heard a female voice purring, "Solo, you are so wonderful."

In bed with his back to her was her man making love to a blonde-haired woman. Though she couldn't see his face, his dark hair was visible leaving no doubt in her mind as to whom it could be.

"Kak ty mog? Svoloch, V tom zhe zdanii, ne menʹshe. (How could you? You bastard. In the same building, no less.)" She turned, storming out of the apartment after dropping her onyx ring, the symbol of their love, on the table.



Napoleon entered his apartment tired filled with disappointment. The previous day he had received information from an informant, to obtain the address to the location where a secret meeting was to be held. When they raid it two of his men were injured, one was critical and not expected to live and the other, his partner, was spending the night in medical with a bullet wound in his shoulder. This was all because of a lie.

The informer had been paid to set them up, and they had stepped right into a trap. In spite of it all, Napoleon still managed to get the address but not all the ones who had laid in wait for them including the boss Wilhelm and a few of his men.

Walking into his bedroom, he flipped on the light.

"What the hell? Robert, what are you two doing in my bed?" he demanded.

"Hey cousin, sorry. You said you wouldn't be home to late morning, and your bedroom is so much bigger and better equipped than your guest room, I didn't think you you'd mind."

Napoleon rubbed his eyes and sighed, "I'll just sleep in the guest room for the rest of the night."

He started to head out of the room when Robert called to him, "Sorry, my stuff is all over the room."

Sighing, he answered unhappily, "Then I'll sleep on the couch."

Napoleon walked out heading towards the living room. Turning up the light, he noticed the bottle of Gosset Champagne. He'd once mentioned to Jo that it was one of his favorite champagnes, making him wonder if she'd been here. Then lying next to it, he saw the commitment ring he'd given her as a symbol of their future together.

It suddenly dawned on him and tore at his heart suspecting why she had left it.

Napoleon rushed back to the bedroom. "Was there another woman here earlier looking for me?" He yelled at the startled couple.

"Some crazy strawberry blonde came in while we were busy.  Actually walked into the bedroom on us and said something in a foreign language that didn't sound very nice, and then stormed out." Robert said shrugging his shoulders.

"Did she see you?"

"Hey man, we had candles around the room. Besides, she took off before I could say anything to her.

"Damn it," Napoleon roared.

His cousin looked enough like him to fool anyone who was in the mood he was now sure Jo had been in when at the time. He had heard about how her assignment had gone and then to find his cousin in his bed with a woman, thinking it was him.

Napoleon went to the living room, angrier than he'd been in a long time. He headed down to Jo's apartment slipping in with his key.

He walked inside hoping she was there but finding it empty. He searched each room to be sure; then sitting on the sofa, he pulled out his communicator.

"Open Channel D."

"Good evening Napoleon," Sharon, the cute brunette from communication answered. "What can I do for you?"

"Can you tell me if Miss Kuryakin is in headquarters?"

"Sorry, but she's not here. I actually have her checked out for the next three days. Can I do something for you Napoleon?" she asked her voice indicating she was open to any suggestions."

"Ah, no thanks, not tonight Sharon. Is her tracer still working?" he inquired.

"It is, sir!" She answered, upset that he had brushed her off.

"Where is she right now?"

"Northern New Jersey, and still moving south."

"Thank you. I've been unable to reach her by communicator, she's not responding. If she checks in, please let her know I'm trying to reach her."

"Yes, sir!"

He knew where Jo was heading now. The one place she claimed where she could actually think-Rehoboth Beach in Delaware. A cozy little seaside resort, a well-kept secret hidden away from the world during the winter


After catching a few hours of sleep, Napoleon received Waverly's permission to take the day off, and he decided to head to Delaware. He'd taken Jo to Rehoboth Beach once for a long weekend in the winter, and she'd fallen in love with it.

The boardwalk was quiet and almost empty during the winter. The small town with it nearby park allowed a visitor to walk throughout the town on foot and think. This was what she had said pulled her toward it. Now whenever she had time or needed some space she retreated there.

He checked the Atlantic Sands Hotel where she always stayed because it was right on the ocean and found her registered under one of her aliases. Heading out toward the wooden boardwalk that ran along the beach, he spotted her sitting on the edge of it.

He walked up to her then sat in silence close beside her.

"I do not wish to see you or talk to you. Please leave, Napoleon."

"I think I know why you're angry. Please, let me explain, it wasn't me."

"Do not lie to me; at least allow me the dignity of honesty."

"But Jo?"

"If you will not go then I will."

She stood up, starting to leave, but he sprang up grabbing her arm.

She turned quickly, hitting him in the eye and sending him off the boardwalk into the sand below before running off toward the hotel.

Napoleon climbed back onto the boardwalk covered in sand, just in time to see two men grabbing Jo and pulling her to their car. Though fighting them, she was overpowered and pushed into it as they took off. It happened quickly, yet he recognized one of the abductors. He was one of the men that had been involved in his mission to obtain that address and had managed to escape the encounter the night before.

Napoleon had no idea where they would have taken her, or what they planned to do with her. He spent the next few hours searching for her, but without success after calling into headquarters alerting them to the kidnapping.

During this time, he berated himself for not being aware that they must have followed him from New York. He had been upset about Jo leaving that he didn't take the precautions that he realized he should have.

He knew that he had to head back to New York, assuming they would attempt to contact him, if that was their strategy. Because of the man he had recognized, he now had no doubt that it was the address they wanted, but there was no way he'd turn over to them, so he began to plan to rescue her as he returned to New York.


As he reached the tailor shop, he heard his name called. Turning, hand on his gun, he saw a small poorly dressed child with an envelope in his hand.

"Some guy said you would give me a dollar if I gave this to you—if you're Mr. Solo?"

He stared at the little boy, angry that Thrush was using him. "Did you see where the man who gave this to you went?"

"No sir. He showed me your picture and told me that you would be coming by soon and if I waited you would give me a dollar."
Napoleon took a five out of his wallet, handing it to him, "Thank you. But a piece of advice. Don't trust strangers, I might have been someone who could have hurt you."

"Wow five bucks, thanks mister. Oh no, you wouldn't hurt me, the man said you are a good guy then he laughed," he called as he ran away.

Napoleon continued down the stairs and entered the shop. "Check this out for me will you Del."

The tailor put the envelope in a specially built box to check it for explosives then after it came up negative, he handed it back to the agent.

"Thanks," Napoleon said as he entered headquarters. Illya was waiting at the entrance for his partner after hearing about his sister's kidnapping.

"You were supposed to stay in medical for a day," Napoleon chided him.

"What is in the envelope?" he asked ignoring the statement.

"Hopefully a ransom note. Let's head to Waverly's office. I assume he knows you're out of medical."

llya gave him a small grin. "He knows."


The partners entered Waverly's office together. The head of UNCLE Northwest had just pulled up pictures of the Thrush men who had been taken captive during Solo and Kuryakin's mission, and those who had escaped the engagement. "The note Mr. Solo?"

Napoleon opened it reading it aloud, "Solo, we have the girl. You want her back then bring the address of the meeting place to the warehouse alone at 9 p.m. this evening. Otherwise, we'll deliver her to you dead."

"Not very original but straight to the point. Your plans Mr. Solo?"

"I think a switch sir. If I go in with a false address, I can get close enough to get Miss Kuryakin out and capture the men who are there for the exchange."

"And your backup plan as I'm sure we can assume it's a trap?"

Illya spoke for the first time. "I will have a team of agents ready to enter the building as soon as we receive Mr. Solo's signal."
Waverly looked at the sling holding his arm., "You aren't in shape to lead the attack. I believe you are still on medical restriction."

"I was released an hour ago, sir."

"Yes, I've heard about that." The look that he shot at the Russian let him know he hadn't heard the end of how his release had been obtained.


As there was time before the meeting, he headed home to change. Napoleon entered his apartment finding his cousin still there. Seeing Robert standing before him, he could feel his anger rising.

"Hey cousin, you took off so fast, I didn't get to ask you about the girl. Did you find that chick you ran off after?"

Napoleon made his hand into a fist and glared at his cousin. "Robert, for your safety I suggest that you not say another word about her. I am not in the mood."

"What are you upset about? She not talking to you?"

The CEA shoved past his cousin, heading toward the bedroom to change. "I want you to pack up and leave. I'll be gone for a while, and it probably would be for the best."

"Hey man, are you upset with me? I'm sorry if you lost the girl, but you always seem to have plenty to choose from. Besides from what my friend said, she wasn't anything much to look at and had a Russian accent. Really Napoleon, you should stay with American women."

Napoleon walked into the living room before turning to his cousin. "Be out of here before I get home." With that, he left slamming the door after him and heading quickly to back to headquarters.


Napoleon and Illya finished discussing the plans for the meet when Illya looked at his friend. He could see that something was deeply affecting the agent, and it was not only his sister's kidnapping.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked.

At first Napoleon said nothing. After a few minutes he spoke quietly and with deep emotion.

"It's my fault that she was kidnapped."

"How do you figure that?"

"I wasn't thinking when I went to her, and they must have followed me," he admitted.

"We all make mistakes, and we will get her back."

Illya waited a few more minutes. "That is not all that is upsetting you, my friend is it."

Napoleon sighed, "You remember my cousin Robert?"

"Yes, looks like your twin almost."

"That's him. She found him in my bed with a woman and thought it was me. Now she won't speak or listen to me."

Illya smiled. Knowing his sister, that would have been an explosive meeting. "You will work it out. First, we must get her back."

Napoleon slowly nodded as they slipped their jacket on. "I hope you're right," he said as they walked out the door to meet the rest of the team.


As Napoleon walked into the warehouse, the door behind him slammed shut, and the lock clicked.

"The address Mr. Solo," Wilhelm demanded.

"The girl first." Napoleon countered.

"We both know you're playing a game, but I'm upping the ante," with a nod he had the CEA searched.

They found no gun or communicator, which he had left behind knowing they would search him. But they did find the two tracers that were place for them to find in hopes that they wouldn't expect any other ones.

Napoleon felt the man behind him point a gun toward his head.

"Get him into the van, head to the underground exit, and then blow the building. I'm sure UNCLE has the place surrounded." Wilhelm climbed into the front seat.


Illya was outside waiting for Napoleon's signal. When no signal came in fifteen minutes, he began to set their plan in motion. As the agents outside began moving in, an explosion rocked the area, which caused the agents to hit the ground.

"Anyone hurt?" Illya called out. After being assuring that no one was injured, he sent the others to check the area.

His communication whistled, "Kuryakin."

"Illya, we found a passage that leads under the warehouse about a block south of your location," said Mark Slate.

He took off running toward the location. After meeting Mark, they searched the passage and the nearby area.

"I'm sorry I couldn't stop them mate. I saw Napoleon in the van, but they keep me pinned down until they got away," Mark explained.

"This is how they escaped taking Napoleon with them," Illya explained when the rest of the team assembled.

Illya called for a surveillance van to be brought forward. After turning on the tracers, he found three of the five that had been placed with Napoleon were still working.

"Alright, we can track the signal but carefully. We do not want them to know we are following them until we find where Josephina and Napoleon are being held."


They dragged Napoleon to the room where Jo was being held.

"What's she doing here?" Wilhelm demanded.

Now Napoleon understood what Wilhelm meant when he had accused him of playing games, he didn't know his men had taken Jo.

"She's the woman Solo was arguing with at the beach," one of the guards said.

"You fool, that's Josephina Kuryakin. What the hell are you doing in here?" he said addressing Jo.

"Your men brought me here," she offered in a mocking voice.

Backhanding her, he went to pull her towards him, but Napoleon got between the two of them.

"She has nothing to do with this, Wilhelm."

"Always the gentlemen, Mr. Solo. I want the address and details of the meeting you intercepted, but first I need to talk to Central to see what they want done with her."

"Chain them," he said pointing to the hooks that were embedded in the wall behind them. After the men had hung them up, the guards took positions outside the door.

"It was my cousin," Napoleon said.


"It was my cousin Robert who was in my bed. Most people think we look like twins. We only see one another every few years, and he stopped by yesterday. After I went to the office, he found a friend and brought her home."

Jo looked deeply into his eyes, the truth was written in them.

"I am sorry that I did not trust you. I should have believed in you."

"Hey, if I'd walked into that set up, I would've believed the same thing."

"Thank you but I do not believe that. You do not jump to conclusions like I do."

She was quiet for a few minutes, "So, what do we do next? I am sure you had something up your sleeve when you walked into their trap."

"Let's just hang around for a few more minutes," Napoleon said, smiling at her.

She groaned at his attempt at humor.

Within a few minutes, they could hear the sounds of gunfire and movement in the hall outside their cell. The door blew open, and Illya stepped in, "You ordered a rescue for this time, I believe."

"A few minutes late, but I'm willing to overlook it if you get us down from these hooks," Napoleon answered.

Illya undid his partner's hands. Once free, Napoleon freed Jo's ropes from the hook. As she brought her still bound hands down, she slipped them over his head before reaching up to kiss him. He untied her hands as he kissed her back.

"Could you possible wait until we are out of here before you start anything?" Her brother said as he turned back toward the hall. "Oh, here are your weapons."

They grabbed them, following Illya into the hallway, but the gun battle lasted only a few more minutes before everyone was rounded up and taken into custody.


After the reports were finished Illya was ordered back to medical by Waverly for the rest of the doctor's recommended stay while Jo and Napoleon headed home.

While Napoleon went into his room to change, Jo searched the table for her ring. Napoleon's hand appeared in front of her the ring on his pinky finger.

"Is this what you are looking for?"

As she went to grab it, he pulled his hand back.

"Let's talk," he said as he drew her down onto the couch next to him.

"Guess, I do not really deserve that do I? I mean, I did not even give you the benefit of the doubt when I saw him in your bed."

"I really don't blame you. We both know that I've slept with women since we became serious, I'll admit that I have slept with some other women, but it has been strictly in the line of duty."

"I understand what you need to do, as you know I have to do I. Besides, I know that our choice of careers has been hard on this relationship."

"We've both made a hard choice about our love and our careers. I would never do anything to purposely hurt you."

"I will never doubt you again or at least I will talk to you before I jump to conclusions."

He pulled her toward him then kissed her with a deep desire. She responded with hunger in her eyes. He lifted her up carrying her to his bedroom.


Later that night after they had exhausted themselves with lovemaking, they were laying on the blanket-covered floor, snuggling with each other by the warmth of the fireplace.

"The ring looks better on you than it does on me," he said as he replaced it on her finger. He then handed her a box.

Opening it, she found a pair of earrings that matched her ring. The gold earrings held an onyx teardrop with a golden Chinese symbol for love inlaid in them.

"Oh Napoleon, they are beautiful. Where did you find them?"

"Actually, I had them made for you."

He kissed ears before placing the earrings in each. "I love you so much my sweet Russian lyubovnik."

"I'll be back in a few minutes. Pour some of that champagne," she said and hurried down to her apartment.

When she returned, she held her black leather coat tightly around her. She removed it and hurried under the blankets in front of the fire. Napoleon returned from the kitchen with the glasses of champagne and the bottle in an ice bucket.

Once he crawled under the covers with her, he handed her a glass. "Happy Valentine's my love."

Jo took a sip of the liquid, then pushed the covers down so he could see what she was wearing. She was dressed in a sexy see-through deep red negligee edged in lace. It barely covered her. "Here is my present for you. Happy Valentine's."


"For Valentine, but I can change if you would like," she said as she started to get up.
He pulled her back down, "Don't even think about it. I can give you something far more pleasant to consider."

They heard someone trying to slip a key in the door, which brought both agents out from under the blanket. Grabbing their guns, they headed for the door, Napoleon in his undershorts and Jo wrapped in the blanket. She stood behind the door while he pulled it open.

"Hi cousin. Forgot my camera, so thought I'd pick it up."

Walking into the room he said, "Did you find that chick?"

Jo came up behind him placing her gun against his back, "He did, and she does not like being called a chick."

Robert turned with a frightened look on his face. "I'm sorry if I offended you."

"Next time you decide to use someone's bed, I suggest you make sure it is not his." With that, she walked toward the blankets on the floor, not hiding the fact that she was scantily clad.

Robert hurried to the guest room, getting his camera. "She's dangerous," he whispered as he passed his cousin.

"You're right, but she's mine. Goodnight Robert."

After his cousin left, Napoleon joined Jo on the floor in front of the fire where they spent the rest of the night showing just how much they loved each other

Tags: illya, jo, napoleon, valentine

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