jkkitty (jkkitty) wrote,

Wilds of Canada Affair Chapter 1 of 7

Inocencio Oreato from the Babyhead Fungus Affair returns looking to get even with the agents.  From the small town of Llano, Texas to the wilds of Canada, UNCLE attempts to put an end to a fungus which once more is designed to make people mindless slaves. 
Thanks to yelizaveta52 for helping me clean this up.

Chapter 1
Del Floria was working the press when a fully uniformed Texas Ranger walked in.  The man looked around for a moment then addressed the tailor.

“Howdy there.  I need to see Mr. Solo, Mr. Kuryakin, or girlie.  They said if I ever needed to contact them to come here, but I think maybe I got me the wrong place.  This sure doesn’t look like UNCLE’s headquarters.”images

Looking him over Del Floria placed his hand on the button under his counter activating an alarm inside headquarters before placing his hand on the gun.

“Who are you and what did you want, sir?”  He asked confusion coloring his voice giving Section Two time to look over the man before him.

“I’m Ranger Samuel Boyds from Llano, Texas. Look I know they’re secret agents and all but I need to talk to them.  Girlie especially made a point of telling me to contact her anytime.”

“Who’s girlie?”

“You know-waist long strawberry blonde hair and irritating as a cactus under your seat when she’s mad."

Del Floria tried to conceal a smile, but the tailor knew the man had met Josephina Kuryakin someplace in the past.  The phone rang calling his attention to it.


Napoleon Solo and Illya Kuryakin were at their desk when a call came in from security.

“Mr. Solo, there a Texas Ranger out at the front counter.  Says he wants to see you, Illya, or girlie.”

The coffee Napoleon has just sipped sprayed out of his mouth.  “Is his name Samuel Boyds?”  He asked after recovering.

“Yes sir.  What would you like me to do?”

“Illya and I will be straight down so have him wait at the reception desk.  And if you value your life, I wouldn’t repeat that girlie comment.”

“Yes sir and I value my life too much to ever share it.” With that Security hung up.

Napoleon phoned Jo, “Meet your brother and me at the reception desk now.”

Nodding his head and hanging up the phone, he headed out the door with his partner following right behind him.


Arriving at the front desk, they saw Samuel had the receptionist laughing and the Section Two agent guarding the entrance shaking his head.

“Then she bent his thumb up bringing him to his knees.  The other people in the restaurant cheered her on.  Yea, girlie did leave a lasting impression.”

“Samuel, how nice to see you again.  Are you visiting?”  Napoleon asked to try to prevent any more stories.

“Howdy, Napoleon, Illya,” he said as he gave each a bear hug.

“You did say to look you up if I needed anything.  Well we have some problems and one or two of them guys in that birdie uniform have been seen in town.  Hey, where girlie?”

Jo walked through the door as he asked.  She stopped upon seeing the Texas Ranger saying with mock anger.  “Samuel, I asked you not to call me that.”

He took a few steps toward her, lifting her up and swinging her around. “Oh my favorite female spy. Fess up now, you’re glad to see me.”

Jo managed to remove herself from his arms glowering at the Section Two who was grinning causing him to hide his smile quickly.  “It is nice to see you Sheriff Boyds.”

“Oh oh guess I’ve upset the little lady already.” He said his eye twinkling with laughter.  “I’m sorry, but I say it with the utmost respect.  So there’s no need to have a hissy fit now.”

“Give the Ranger a Section Two visitor’s pass,” Napoleon ordered shaking his head.

Leading the group back to his office, he noticed the visitor looking around the halls they were moving through.

“How do you find anything, everything is gray and nothing is identified?”

“Habit,” Napoleon explained.  “Every headquarters is set up the same so we can go from one to another and feel at home.  Here’s our office.”

The door opened to reveal two desks, a couch, file cabinet and closet. It was easy to see which desk was Napoleon’s as there were personal items on and around it.  Except for a picture of Napoleon and Jo on the Russian’s desk, his area was bare.

Jo and Samuel sat on the couch while the men sat at their desk.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to see you Samuel but what’s the purpose of the visit?”

“Well Napoleon, like I said we’re trouble and a few of those Birdie guys of your have been seen in the area.”

“Trouble?” Illya asked.

“Remember when you were at the Badu House there was a large piece of polished llanite which is our major source of our revenue in the area.” The ranger started.  Everyone nodded.

“Well, we’re also known as is "The Deer Capital of Texas" and the deer hunters pour into the town during November and December each year bringing in our other big source of yearly income.  There has been a large number of deer found dead with the same symptoms that those kids that died before.”  He stopped letting the information sink in.

The agents remember the Llanite, a rare type of brown rhyolite porphyry with sky-blue quartz crystals and rusty-pink microcline feldspar which Thrush had used it to help process a deadly fungus that was to be used to control the population.   Although stopped, six students had died from it, and Napoleon was almost a victim.

“You mentioned that a few men in Thrush uniforms were seen in the area?”  Napoleon asked.

“Not hiding it either.  Actually came into town even though they were whomperjawed in town.”

“Whomperjawed?” Napoleon gave him a confused look.

“You know something that doesn’t fit right.  That uniform just made them stick out.” Illya grinned,
“Glad to see I am not the only one who has a problem with American idioms. How does it feel to have the sock on the other shoe?”

“Shoe on the other foot,” Napoleon said giving his partner a look that let him know he wasn't amused.

“Anyways these guys walked around and actually went right to a camp outside of town so brazened that it was almost like they wanted us to know where they were. Dad gum it, I ain’t going to let them guys mess up my town again.  You need to help me get rid of them for good this time.”  The Texas Ranger was frustrated and wanted action now.

“We need to take this to our boss, let’s see if he can see us,” Napoleon pick up the phone.

“Wanda my love,” he started and grinned as he noticed Jo shot him a look while rolling her eyes.

 “Does he have some time?  We have a problem we need to discuss with him.”

Wanda let him know it would be an hour before Waverly would be free.

Making the appointment, Napoleon suggested eating before going to the meeting.

“Some vittles would be good.” Sam agreed.


The sheriff and three agents were in Waverly office at the appointed time, and waited quietly for him to review the file of the Babyhead Fungus Affair.  Although most of the staff had been captured Inocencio Oreato, the head scientist had escaped.

The drug has never worked as it should but an antidote had been created to fight the fungus.  Now it looked as if Thrush had once again been experimenting and back in Llano.

1174534_574776602570568_862135415_n“Sheriff Boyds I understand from Mr. Solo, Thrush is up to their old tricks again.  It’s too bad my people couldn’t have captured the doctor the first time to prevent this from happening again.”  He looked at his three agents who accepted the admonishment as it was meant.

“Well nothing we can do about that now,” he said glancing down at the file.  “Gentlemen what do you think.”

“We discussed this at lunch and believe it’s an invitation to a trap.” Napoleon answered for the group.

“I afraid I agree.  However, we need to put a stop to this before it gets too far this time.  Mr. Solo and Mr. Kuryakin you’ll accompany Sheriff Boyds back to Llano and put a stop to whatever is happening.  Also remove Dr. Oreato from future threats however you have to.”

“What about me sir?” Jo spoke up.

“Miss Kuryakin you and Mr. McLaughlin have an assignment to complete. See to the arrangement Mr. Solo and keep me informed.”

As they left the office, Jo complained.  “Babysitting the son of some ambassador is not my idea of what I consider an assignment.”

Napoleon laughed, understanding how an assignment like that can be, but necessary as the ambassador was being pressured to vote for a bill that would give Thrush access to a number of arm’s plants.

“Oh it's not that bad,” Napoleon kidded her.

“He likes older women and I am just his perfect age according to him.  He has trapped me in a room a number of times trying to kiss me.  One of these times, I am going to sleep dart him.”

The men laugh before Illya said, “Not allowed, Sesternka (little sister). Waverly would have you filing reports for the next year.”

“Even that might be better than having to fight off an over-sexed sixteen-year-old.”

“Why not just use that thumb lock of your?” Samuel suggested.

“Not allowed either.  Well, keep in touch you two, I better go relieve Jimmy.  When that kid is not trying to get me alone, he is driving Jimmy nuts with his Jimi Hendrix obsession.”  Jo left the men in the hall.

“Seems that girl is a might fit to be tried.”  Samuel watched her walk away determination in her step.

“We’ve all had that type of assignment, and as of yet none of us have killed the person we’ve been assigned to protect.  Though Illya came close.”

A growl from his partner kept Napoleon from going on.

“Let’s make some plans.” The CEA suggested laughing.

Chapter 2 http://jkkitty.livejournal.com/57811.html
Tags: wilds of canada affair

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